Happy Easter!

I was told by my grandmother that she was going to tell on me, to all my WW friends, because of my behavior this weekend...

I refuse to say that I've been bad. I refuse to say that I've blown it and messed up.

A member came to me on Saturday asking "how I do it". "It" being eat a little more freely on Saturday and then getting myself right on track without blinking an eye. I told her that the key to it all was tracking.

After this weekend, I believe the key to it all is the mentality behind your journey.

Yep, I'll admit it...I spent the whole week talking to myself and making the decision to not track Saturday and Sunday. I decided not to track after my first 2 meals on Saturday because I was going to a family buffet that was going to be absolutely delicious and I did NOT want to spend quite a bit of time tracking food when I could spend time with family.

SO I didn't...and I filled up 2 plates. Had great sources of protein and vegetables, but also enjoyed a really delicious piece of bread. I then filled up a second plate with fresh fruit, and any dessert I felt so inclined to try. Most were delicious, but the ones that were NOT yummy after the fist bite, back on the plate it went. I left feeling SO FULL but also so liberated because I did NOT feel guilty about my meal!

Later that evening all the girls got together and went to Kneader's for dinner. I decided, while waiting in line, that I was going to get a hot reuben sandwich. I get to the front of the line, and I panic. I order a BBQ salad instead with dressing on the side. What? I panicked and ordered a salad? WHO IS THIS PERSON?! Oh yeah, it's me...making healthy lifestyle changes while still eating things that are delicious. And really, the salad was so delicious. I'm grateful for my panic button being equipped with the spill out words of salad ordering.

When I came to my senses, my sister was ordering and I told her to order a cinnamon roll on the side of her meal...so we could share it.

Phew...yeah, we're good. Back to eating the way I wanted to with no guilt required. :)

EASTER SUNDAY!! We had Belgium waffles for breakfast and I ate 2 whole, protein packed, waffles with scrambled eggs and blueberries on the side. The waffles I made for myself were from a fellow Connect member, shout out to @mudhustler for his Big Bad A** Waffles for only 4 smartpoints each. You use Kodiak waffle mix, Quest protein powder, cinnamon, stevia, brown sugar stevia, baking powder, and water. That mix makes 2 waffles. Light, crispy, and very delicious.

We then head to church and I'm sporting my mint green Easter dress I was so excited to wear. Felt a little more full and a little heavier than usual today, but I knowingly contribute that ALL to my food choices being heavy on the carbohydrate side. It'll be gone by Tuesday, maybe even tomorrow.

After church, I got Little Man down for his nap and my husband, sister, and myself all decided to do a light lunch, enjoy some Easter candy, and then have Easter dinner later tonight. Homemade chicken noodle soup for lunch, and then I ate whatever Easter candy my little heart desired.

I enjoyed 1 Trader Joe's Peanut Butter Salted Caramel truffle, 1 Trader Joe's Cinnamon Graham cracker, I lost track of Reese's Mini Peanut Butter Eggs, but I think it was around 10, um 3 See's Candy Gummies, 2 Mystery Flavored Peep Chicks, and a whole BigKat KitKat bar I just couldn't put down...and then I stopped and called it an afternoon. Tonight we will be having roasted spaghetti squash with homemade turkey/chicken meatballs, jell-o Easter jigglers, and my See's Chocolate Butter Egg as well as my See's Chocolate Bordeaux Egg, and maybe eat my personal package of Cadbury Eggs.

YES! I LEARNED MY LESSON! I did NOT purchase a big size bag of Cadbury eggs...just a personal size. And I call that a victory! I only purchased candy that I REALLY wanted this time of year...No robin eggs, no whopper eggs, no jelly beans, no personal box of Chick Peeps, no personal chocolate bunnies, no mini caramel Cadbury eggs wrapped in gold wrapping, and no mini Cadbury eggs wrapped in the blue and red and green wrapping that come in like 12 to a package!

This Easter has been a GREAT victory for me and I feel like I've come SO FAR and done SO MUCH GOOD and have made SO MANY GOOD CHANGES compared to last year, that I can't help but celebrate. I only bought the candy that mattered to me, and heck yes, I am totally enjoying it.

This picture is of our family share bowls. The eggs contain sour gummies from See's that were divided out of only ONE package, there are 4 suckers-1 of strawberries and cream and well as orange cream-2 for me and 2 for my husband. A package of Chocolate Butter Eggs to share with my husband, myself, my sister, and baby, and then 2 packages of personal Cadbury eggs for my husband and I, an opened package of an already consumed KitKat bar, and then a little bowl of 1 package of Reese's Eggs. If those are NOT consumed by tonight, they are going to be packaged up and sent away with my husband to work. Unfortunately those little delicious morsels do NOT come in individualized packages and are also a weakness for me. Boo.

But, I've enjoyed my food. Like I said, I spent the whole week deciding that I would NOT track Saturday and Sunday, just to try this aspect of my journey. Even though I have enjoyed my weekend, I don't think I'll do it again without a lot of contemplation beforehand. I'm so ready to get back with my tracker Monday morning and getting all of my FitPoints this coming week. Every weekend I feel like I'm getting stronger in my resolve to change my eating. It may not seem like it to all of you, but I really do feel like my choices are getting easier and easier to make. I'm not tempted by candy bars in the store; now it's deciding whether or not to buy a second package of blueberries that are on sale or saving a bit more money to go out to Trader Joe's and purchase a 3rd Opal Apple. 

These treat-a-palooza weekends are few and far between for me, and this holiday is the first that I've decided not to track. I still feel accountable because, frankly, I'm tattling on myself.

But I do this so that all you out there can keep hope. You CAN eat what you want, you just have to get your brain and your emotions on board. Even if you've eaten as much as I have this weekend, or eaten the equivalent of my consumption in under an hour today...Do NOT tell yourself that you've blown it. Stop yourself and think about the mentality behind your actions. Were you self-aware or were you trying to fix, hide from, ignore something? If yes to any of the phrases I mentioned after the word "or"...

It's alright. I forgive you. Now, forgive yourself. Go to the mirror, RIGHT NOW, and say "I accept myself completely and unconditionally, right now." You may even substitute the word "accept" for "forgive" and then say the phrase AGAIN with "accept". After doing this, commit with me to get back on plan and back to your regular structure with the sunset and be ready to conquer the day with the sunrise.

Happy Easter, everyone. He is Risen. Because He conquered death, so shall we! Because He conquered all sin and paid for our debts, we too can master the mortal man within us-conquer our appetites of the natural man, and be our best selves. I am grateful to my Savior, Jesus Christ, for all He did for me and all He does to continue to bless my life.

May you find His peace with you this wonderful, beautiful, delicious, Easter Day!

All my love,

Camille

*Later that evening...Turns out I did NOT eat my See's Butter Egg. I decided to save that for NEXT Saturday rather than make myself sick. I ate my mini eggs, and surprisingly, they weren't as delicious as the day I ate an unlimited amount. Not wanting them again any time soon. As for the Chocolate Bordeaux egg? I ate only half and am saving the other half for next Saturday :) I decided to end my night with my last 32oz bottle to complete my 128 oz water consumption a day, and a good handful of sour See's gummy bunnies. Life is good :)